Dick Picks

Or – what women really think when we see your dick

Look, guys, I actually like dick pics better than most women.  I enjoy seeing proof that my pics turn you on.

But you have to understand that women are not wired like men.  Men are visual creatures.  You see titties, you get hard.  Very simple equation.

Women, in case you’ve been living in a cave, ain’t that simple.  Seeing a dick does not automatically make us wet. So what do we really think when we see your dick?

Most women:
“i hope he’s not going to expect me to suck that thing.  I mean, geez, what kind of girl does he think I am, anyway?  I don’t suck on the first date!  Okay, well maybe that once, but that was the tequila talking.  But not this time!  I’m not a slut!  Oh crap I need to suck in my stomach….”

Sluts:
“He’s going to want me to suck that thing.  Oh Lord, I hope he at least washed it.  I hate when it smells like pee.  And I hope his cum tastes half way decent.  That one guy….. damn, did he eat asparagus for dinner or something?    Yuk!  Oh crap, I need to suck in my stomach….”

I hate to disappoint you, boys, but that’s what’s going through our heads as you wave that thing around.  Want to turn her on?   Kiss her.  Nibble her neck.  Pinch her nipples.  Find her clit.  And then USE that dick on her.  Soft and slow or hard and fast, and make her forget about sucking in her stomach.